What’s Love Got To Do With It?

When we think about alcohol, we often focus on the physical side of it — the hangovers, the cravings, the sleep issues, the health risks. But if you take a closer look, there’s something deeper going on under the surface. Something messier, more human. And that’s emotion.

So… what’s love got to do with it?
Actually — everything.

Most of us don’t reach for a drink just because it tastes nice. We drink because we’re stressed. Because we’re sad, lonely, bored, anxious, overwhelmed, or just trying to feel connected. We drink to soften a hard day, to ease heartbreak, to celebrate love, or sometimes, to numb the pain of its absence.

In short: alcohol can become our go-to way of handling emotions — both the big ones and the small ones.

Why this matters
The problem is, when we use alcohol to manage how we feel, we never really learn to sit with those emotions or work through them. We outsource emotional regulation to a bottle. And over time, that can trap us in a cycle — drink to cope, feel worse, drink again.

The truth is, emotions aren’t the enemy. They’re messengers. Signals that something needs attention. And when we drink over them, we drown out what they’re trying to tell us.

So, what can we do instead?
Here are a few ways to begin handling emotions without alcohol — gently, gradually, and with compassion:

1. Pause and Name It
When you feel the urge to drink, take a moment and ask: What am I feeling right now? Naming the emotion — even something as simple as “I’m overwhelmed” — helps create space between you and the automatic urge to numb.

2. Feel Without Fixing
This one is hard. We’re so used to pushing feelings away. But sometimes, just sitting with a feeling — letting it be there without needing to solve it — is powerful. Emotions pass through if we let them.

3. Write it Out
Journaling is a great way to get what’s in your head out onto paper. It doesn’t have to be neat or make sense. Just write. Getting it out can take the edge off and help you make sense of what’s really going on.

4. Move Your Body
Emotions are energy. Going for a walk, stretching, dancing in your kitchen — anything that gets you moving — helps release emotional tension and reconnect with your body.

5. Talk to Someone You Trust
You don’t have to do this alone. A supportive chat with a friend, a coach, or a counsellor can help you process what you’re feeling without the need to drink it away.

6. Breathe
When you’re flooded with emotion, even a few deep breaths can regulate your nervous system and ground you in the present moment. Try five slow breaths — in through your nose, out through your mouth.

Learning to sit with and respond to our emotions — rather than avoid them — is one of the most powerful shifts we can make in changing our relationship with alcohol. It takes practice, patience, and often support. But the reward is real emotional freedom — not just numbing what hurts, but feeling more alive, more connected, and more in charge of your life.

Because when you stop drinking over your feelings…
You actually start feeling your life.

And that, I think, is what love’s got to do with it.